What a friend said earlier today...

Friend:  My prayers go out to Japan but I am not impressed by anyone's concern for Japan right now. You're heartbroken over something that happened on the other side of the world but don't care about terrible things that happen down the street? Yeah right. I'm not impressed.

My question:  Agree or disagree?

Posted By Trance City on 13 Mar 2011 05:08 PM

What a friend said earlier today...

Friend:  My prayers go out to Japan but I am not impressed by anyone's concern for Japan right now. You're heartbroken over something that happened on the other side of the world but don't care about terrible things that happen down the street? Yeah right. I'm not impressed.

My question:  Agree or disagree?

I somewhat agree, because people often do overlook what happens in their own back yard, but not really. It's kind of like saying, "I'm not impressed by anyone's concern over the murder of Bob right now. You're heartbroken over something that happened to a man who isn't even alive anymore. Why not show some more concern over the kids down the street who get scraped knees every day? Yeah right. I'm not impressed.


The severity of the damage matters. The earthquake in Japan was a big one. People have died and buildings have been razed. Much of what we see daily in the US certainly shouldn't be ignored, but it's simply not as big of a deal. That's reality.

Let's put this in metaphorical terms:

Man 1's house is on fire

Man 2 is slowly dying of starvation.

Are both of these important? Yes, but which is more important at this given moment? Obviously Step 1 should be to contain the fire in Man 1's house. Then once that is done we would attempt to find food for Man 2. It would be foolish to rally on about those who care to contain the fire in Man 1's house because we have been ignoring Man 2s starvation. Both are important, but one has more imperative to be worked on right now because more harm can come from not working on Man 1's problem first. For example, he could 1.) completely lose his house and be without shelter or 2.) the fire could spread to the houses that surround it and cause more damage. As in Japan, what if all of the nuclear reactors fail? It's not like that radiation just goes away. It permeates the soil, water, air, and every living creature around it. Then, once it hits the air, it travels, causing damage somewhere else.

Are there people who don't care about either Man 1 or Man 2 but only care about the situation if they are either Man 1 or Man 2? Yes, but I don't necessarily agree that because one shows that they care about what happened in Japan that they do not necessarily care about the poor children down the street.

 

any kind of crisis would cripple us because the people who keep things running would be spending time doing other things.

really the diversity of opinion and thought allows us to accomplish much more to assist the people in need than otherwise.

I have to feel that if I were enduring some disaster like the one in Japan I would be in favor of more people who, nonempathetically and unemotionally, got busy doing something to help and fewer people impotently sobbing into their mocha lattes.  I'm just saying, helpful actions > sympathy in a crisis.  Later on, when overcoming the PTSD, sympathetic, caring people might be more helpful, but for now, three cheers for the doers! 

Ahh... nothing much... just the whole country.

Coincidentally, a mate of mine started a cafe in Tokyo recently. It was a bit shaky at first, now people are flooding in. The place is also starting to develop a radiating glow... ahh... the inappropriate jokes... [I'm still feeling sympathetic, don't get me wrong]

@Lauren- great to have you on the forum! I really appreciate having mature members on board. Yes, go the doers! Here's some interesting facts about ENFP's (from http://www.discoveryourpersonality.com/abouttypes.html)

• With ESTJs, had highest total coping resources of all the types.
• Ranked 1st of all 16 types in using social and emotional coping resources and 2nd in using cognitive resources.
• In national sample, ranked lowest in coping with stress by "Developing physical symptoms." [EDIT: does this mean that we are too chillaxed to develop physical symptoms?]

I would say that to achieve the above, we'd need to have a healthy Te tertiary function. This seems to suggest we'd do ok in a crisis.

 

so Japan.... what's shakin'?

I would like to point out, however, that praying can be taken as concern without much action...

First of all, to pray is an action.  Surely I don't need to break that statement down any further.  Secondly, I don't see where anybody disrespected your beliefs by saying they aren't valid in one manner or another.  Why you see the need to try belittle the beliefs of others is beyond me.  

so it seems like your friend is doing the same thing as others who are concerned but not doing anything except expressing sympathy.

To correct your notion, he prays because he believes the best action he can take is to pray.  Just as a side note, he's donated his emergency savings.  For you to assume that prayer is the only action he's taken makes you, without question, seem quick to judge and persecute.  I would suggest thinking before taking action, dear.