I've gotten the impression that ENFP women fly out of a bad relationship like a phoenix reborn, grasping at life with both hands and flinging themselves into some juicy affairs. A serious relationship won't be at the forefront of their minds....and any whiff of a guy with serious intentions is like a signal to run. Younger ENFPs run physically, putting distance between themselves and any contact with the person who is interested. Older ENFPs emotionally withdraw to the same effect. Be aware of the signals you give off....and don't approach a woman with anything but friendship. Let things happen on their own and stop demanding so much. Your expectations are an unscaleable wall, my friend.

Thank you both.

aloofness? as an enfp i feel more fear. just be gentle and not too forward as people who are tend to find their attentions unrequited. im speaking from somewhat limited experience but i think thats true of some enfps.

btw love the quote. Polonius, Act I, Hamlet, am I right?

Yes.

I could definitely fit in this category, as I have had negative relationships with men early in life. I put up walls or test a person to find intelligence or a genuinely caring person because I do not want to waste more time and energy on disappointment. I automatically will be turned off if I feel a guy is giving me BS or is egocentric.In fact if this is blatantly shown within the first three interactions I will altogether write the person off and show them a poker face that conceals any of my enthusiasm, intelligence, creativity, humor, or wide interests. I'll even try to make myself seem shallow or slow to get things if I think that will do the trick. I've never been one to rebound from a relationship as I can have a fabulous time with just lil ol me. How could one penetrate this wall? A guy would initially pique my interest if he show me that we had some lasting thing in common even it was a career choice or passion of mine, but that could wear off. If he were in the same social circle I might be forced to see him through more objective eyes. Now, if he gave a selfless gesture to someone I really cared about, I might even admit he is a good guy and would be contracted not to reject him. Hope that helps : )

I'm the definition of ENFP.  I remember telling anyone that dated me, that I was very much like a bar of soap, if hold on too tight I will slip away. 

Turns out I married the guy that came over my house every day, sat on my couch and asked me how my day went, looking completely entertained by all my antics.  It was so nice to not have to chase a guy I was in heaven, everytime I turned around he was there.  He didnt stay long at first, and he wasnt a big talker but he listened well and I like being center stage.   

He didnt solve my problems but more commenserated with me, and took me out for coffee on a bad day, and was completely real and brutally honest with me (I respected the last part more than anything else).  We have been together 18 years now.

Alysaria, you just made me feel so much more comfortable with myself xD Because I have infact, physically ran from relationships. I'm .... not necessarily WITH a guy at the moment but we both have strong feelings for each other. However, I was totally honest with him about the fact that I don't want to get into a relationship. This is because they've always been ruined. Either because I would physically run away and ignore the person who just asked me out until he ended it, purely out of fear and the feeling of "OH MY WHAT AM I DOING" or because when I finally stopped running, and MADE myself stop, and after calming down after the first week of "I HATE THIS AND I WANT OUT"the guy turned out to be....less than desirable......

Though, the guy I'm interested in atm really does it for me because he really wants a relationship but the fact that he said he'll wait for me just.... I'm not sure. Makes me feel less agitated at the idea of being in a relationship with him. It feels safer because he has my interests at heart. He's not just doing it because he's not interested, however. He's made that very clear.

Dedication and patience is defiantely key, I think.

Like taming a wild horse ^-^ Lol.
The fact that he says that he'll wait till I tell him with 100% surity that I want to be in a relationship with him, until he asks me out -because I know I wouldn't be able to.... well, atm at least- is comforting It makes everything feel nice, safe, calm and not sufficating. Lol!