From extensive research on the Internet, this relationship can either be wonderful, or it can be extremely frustrating. I can attest to both. I'll share my experiences here, I guess.

When I first met my ISTP boyfriend, I'd typed him as an INTJ--when he took the test, he came out as INTJ. And he did seem like it: sarcastic, logical, all those wonderful qualities that make INTJs so loveable. <3 Yet when I attempted to draw him into conversation, he'd either make a joke and wriggle out of it or give me one straight, definite answer without much explanation, effectively ending any sort of further commentary. Which was weird but also intriguing; it became a sort of game, trying to get him to tell me his thoughts. And they were usually quite interesting. It was just...they followed one track, and while he would listen to me talk about the different possibilities, he didn't see the point. He had his answer. He gave me his answer. Wasn't that enough? I loved that he had all of these hidden reasons for them: that he could give a seemingly illogical answer and then back it up. I loved that he had a whole world that he rarely showed anyone. It was just that the blocks that he used to build it weren't as brightly colored and intricately carved. They were just blocks. Even if they did make pretty architecture, I couldn't stare at it for long periods of time and I had to rearrange them. [If that metaphor makes sense.]

Something that frustrates me is his inability to talk about emotions. He can if I do enough prodding, but I don't want to prod. I have this idea that the more you know someone/trust them, the less you should ask them about personal things. Because if they trust you, they'll just automatically talk to you, right? That's been my experience. But he defies all that. [Intriguing and frustrating, grah.]

But yes, emotions. He'll do it in his gestures, but since we have a long-distance relationship, there's not much of it. But verbally, he just can't. He's used to teasing and joking and being blunt--to the point that he knows it might hurt the other's feelings, but he'll say it anyway. And that upsets me quite a bit, yet when I tell him that, he responds that it's just how he is. But it makes me feel like I’m not worth it; that he could find someone else. And even when he compares me to all the other females in his life, it doesn’t help. Sometimes when I’m feeling selfish I want to yell at him, “I’m rare! Don’t disregard me!”

He can take something and run with it for a long, long time. He likes instructing me on things but I get bored easily and want to switch to something else, but he'll be so caught up in it [and it's adorable] that I don't have the heart to stop him, so I'll keep going, too. To combat this, we come up with little games to try and make the process go faster. He's very good at sports--gymnastics, in particular--but also computer programming.

He's not very responsive through text--it's better in person or on the phone, but sometimes I keep feeling like we're missing each other in the dark. I'll tell him a story to try and make him laugh, but he won't, really, because he doesn't know the person. Or he won’t know what to say in reply to that, and stays silent, waiting for me to come up with another topic. Which also frustrates me, because I feel like he completely disregarded what I just said.

The S-mentality is an issue. I keep hoping that because it’s a long-distance relationship, the communication thing is just that, but I don’t know. What I love is how he makes my brain go quiet--I sometimes burn out just by thinking too much, and he calms me down. What I’m trying to get him to work on is the other times, when I’m excited about something and just want to talk about it. I hope it’s possible; that he’ll at least listen to me, or become interested, or something. I don’t think I’m boring him, but I think I’m getting bored. He doesn’t really like talking about philosophy or anything--he admitted himself he’d rather teach me a cartwheel than engage in a deep discussion. But he’s willing to go through it, and when I do pull him out of his shell, they’re worth it.

There are, I think, a lot of reasons for me to leave. He doesn’t really give me the emotional support I need, because he’s not good at it through text. I know it’s better in person, but I’m still not sure if that’s enough. When I’m angry/hurt/sad about something, he’ll redirect it to himself by being mean so that I have a more focused outlet with which to vent. And he can take it. But what he doesn’t understand is that instead of relieving it, he adds more to it. He doesn’t give enough reaffirmation and I worry, since he rarely talks about our relationship, that I’m annoying him with being too emotional/too energetic and he won’t say anything. We’ve agreed to talk about this the next time we see each other--the medium of the Internet, alas, does not hold up for this sort of communication.

But what keeps me is the fact that I sort of know he’s true. He wouldn’t drive for a total of three hours so he can see me for two. He wouldn’t sacrifice his sleep [he gets up two hours earlier than me, and I sleep about 5-6 hours each night] in order to try and help me through some problem that’s annoying me. It’s just that he doesn’t understand that I can’t take heart from the actions. I need to be told, but not too often, otherwise I’ll get bored. It’s a delicate balance.

Conclusion? ISTPs are great at the little gestures. Verbally, not so much. ENFPs might need to toughen up a little bit if they want it to work. Both parties should work on reaching a middle ground in terms of communication. I don’t know. Any questions? I’ve analyzed this relationship obsessively and I had to get it down somehow. xD

Yeah. My boyfriend's humor is pretty offbeat. xD His timing is impeccable. He's pretty light-hearted, but I don't get to see him interact much around his friends. [Since they're all far away.] Which is something I really want to see; he's so different alone.

Hi there, I wonder if long distance relationships aren't especially hard for ISTPs to handle because of their introverted sensing.  Without you actually there with your guy, I think it is possible he might not be able to understand you properly or feel connected to you.  ISTPs focus a lot on what is immediately in front of them.  Why he won't go visit you, I don't have an answer for that. 

Oops, I totally misunderstood earlier!  Him travelling all that way for a little time with you makes me smile.  Your description of him being interested in your reactions to things and not telling you a whole lot about himself also makes me smile, because it might be type related, as I am an istp and I do that too.  By the way, I think it might be less that he's not interested in the stories so much as he *is* interested in you, so he'll focus the conversation back onto you, heh.  As for opening up, people have their own reasons for doing things and even one person can have many different reasons.. ESID... maybe just ask something if you want to know?  I hate to try to give advice, because then I feel responsible for the result.  But here is a pretty firm opinion, I do think the enfp/istp relationship is the best

Do other istp's ramble?  Anyway.  I love just being around enfps (hence my joining this forum), so:

@both Sakari and Saul, thank you for the welcome.  I'll post a likely equally rambling introduction.