I was withdrawn, however i still managed to get everyone to like me. I didn't like being outside. I'd rather read books. My mom said that in the kindergarten / play school i was bored and didn't go out like the other boys would. I often played alone. Sure, i liked others, but yeah. A lot revolved around "know know now!"

I asked my mum how i was as a child to find out my personality type... She is said i was exhausting. I wanted to know how a nuclear plant worked at the age of 4. I spoke three word sentences at the age of 3. I was super upfront about what i wanted. I went to sleep at 11 o'clock, and 4 o'clock i was saying "Mama, Jan awake! Wake up!"

I asked about everything. I was bold. I was always topping things up. I had to be with my grandparents at the age of 3-4 for a week. I exhausted them. My granddad said to himself: "I will make three crosses when this is over." I heard that and turned around, saying: "three crosses, grandpa? FIVE." with my full hand stretched out.
I said "Goodbye grandpa" to St. Nicolaus on St. Nicolaus day because i knew it was him at age 3-5. I mean, it was obvious, wasn't it? Grandpa always vanishes, then St. Nicolaus comes, who somehow has the same voice as grandpa. And then grandpa says "he is afraid of St. Nicolaus". Lol funny man my grandpa.

As a kid, i hated to participate in nonsensical behavior. In play school, an intern wanted to read a book with us. I asked "can i also see this book myself?". She said "No." I said "I think this is stupid. I will go play with blocks". Something i don't want, i don't do.. I still have problems doing stuff i think is stupid. It's just. It makes NO SENSE, damn. I am not going to be participating in this stupidity.

The nursery nurse was super SJ and told everyone i wasn't normal. She wasn't normal. She was super super super hygienic and i thought she was stupid. I seemed to be the only one who picked up on that. All the other kids thought she was in some kind normal. (It turned out that when she had her own kids, she did everything wrong she could do wrong and even her former collegians said "oh my god" when they were at her house) We didn't like each other. So i mocked her with my behavior, aggravating her even further. I used to take hours to eat my meals (Normally i ate this fast that i was finished once my sisters were seated and then i zoomed off again) I picked my peas from the pea stew with the fork separately to take extra long. And i always looked at her while doing that so that she gets that i was mocking her. LOL.
But she really was stupid. My mom said to her: Don't you get it? He is mocking you totally. While she didn't get it.

 And the funny thing is she called a professor to "subtly look at me" so that the professor saw i wasn't normal. When the thing occured with the intern and the book, she told her "see? he is doing this all the time, that kid isn't normal, he doesn't participate at those things like the others". But the professor said: "I don't know what you have. This kid is totally normal. I would think it stupid too if i had to wait until the intern flipped over the pages and i wasn't even allowed to look at the book myself." Muhahahaha. PWNAGE. 

Lol when i heard all of this i was laughing sooooo hard.

I once ate around 30 dounuts in one turn at the age of 5, shocking everyone. I used to shock people with my behavior. I still get a kick out of shocking people with my behavior, and doing super strange things. I even let myself being photographed as proof. However i have toned down immensely. Man i miss those days when i was free and unbound.

Somehow i always knew i was very different from my peers. However that didn't stop me being different. I was cool with that.

Lol. What's my mbti type? Come on, tell me. I am a grown man i can cope with it.

Hmm..for what i remember i was always very playful, enthusiastic and energetic, mature, a good observator and a good communicator. ...I'm 22 now and, to be honest, i think i haven't changed ...It's just that growing up and becoming part of societies limits has made me lose a lot of my enthusiasm and energy! T_T

Alien, spacey, rational, analytical, romantic, headstrong, blunt, exploratory, bored, confused, frustrated, argumentative, disturbed, alone, neurotic, hurt, lost, panicked, enraged, depressed, numb. Tiny insular fundie bubble, church and it's mindfuck school, personally in 10 person max classrooms combining two grade levels. Probably ISFJ, very deluded, militantly ignorant, deceitful, tantruming mother. Contradictory, arbitrary rules. Recursive, parallel, compounding catch22s. Not allowed to leave the house. No playmates or girls after moving at 5. Righteous alienation and intrusive oppression from the vapid entitled. Waiting, always waiting, other than being coerced into pointless shit while watching my future decay in growing detail while the only ones around to care apathetically to enthusiastically facilitated both. Still waiting, just for much less with much more congealed rage. Other than escapism, mostly just in my head, which tended toward nightmarish, pretty much it sucked. I actually missed the damn nightmares and the vividness of the panic now.

Mother? Uhm, I'm ~$30k and growing into debt, have no car (never did), am stuck on campus during the academic year, and back with her otherwise. Before that, I was just broke, had no job skills, and have clinical depression and social anxiety. Mother's is in a small decaying mill town. There was no public transportation back when and only a minor joke now. Homeless was what was stopping me. Still is. My size means shit, other than annoying cops and threatening short people. Are you suggesting taking up viking? In this age, that'd take at least a small army and military grade hardware.

Let it? I never did friends even as a toddler. I can discuss "intimate" information with a random person on the street then walk away and not care. This was always so. Connection doesn't work like that for me. I don't appear to do platonic at all. Erotic has yet to come up but unsurprisingly has very complicate set of conditions which have to be for even an attempt. I don't have to run away. There's no one HERE, superficially similar coordinates but at least 1 dimension off.

HAD clinical depression and social anxiety*

And before you start anything about a job now. I still don't have the degree yet or any job skills since the CS BS curriculum is about what it sounds like, mostly BS, and has very little applicability beyond just passing the degree requirement for a job interview for any entry level IT job, outside of intentionally being prep for a graduate degree, which almost no one actually does. Public transportation in the "university city" area sucks too, partly since we're literally half the distance from the next town over than from uptown, and my GPA's plummeting nicely all on its own. It's doesn't need help. Scheduling broken too. We only have one or two sections for any upper level class. Bloody teacher admitted getting a degree in the next state because it was easier than walking across the street to this place. My max credit hours for financial aid's about up anyway, so I finish in a semester, or I'm running on scant loan surplus, if I won't be anyway next semester just for taking the full credit hours I'll need to graduate. Flipping burgers would just blow it all to hell immediately and probably get someone else hurt, if not from the simple joys of that sweet lifestyle itself, then when I severely dissonate to all that lovely debt with no chance for the degree thus no career to pay it off while going back to Mother's semi-permanently again, when it did fail.