I just did the personality test a few days back and feel excited that im in many ways, very accurately described. But I also have issues with being typecast. Is it the same for you guys? Must say the benefits of reading about weaknesses etc has so far exceeded any downside.

After reading a few posts im amazed that ppl here actually use the same thought process as I do. So I figured I list some stuff I usually do that might be perceived as a bit different and see if you do the same.

For example, I have a very bad sense of direction. Not read anything about that here, is that just something I have? The reason, I think, is that my mind is always engaged in something making me not focus on my location, lol. I also tend to try to look at EVERYONE I pass. In my head I can even make small stories on what have lead them up to that point in their life. For instance if im on a subway I could firstly tell you a short summary about everyone there, and by experience I know im fairly accurate. Ask me which stop we are on though and the answer will not come as fast...

I even remember in junior high all the girls wanted me to palmread them. All I did was see them interact and then made assumptions about them using my instincts. Has anything similar happend to you guys? I think this helped me practice on my feeling and intuiton.

Im also quite a good poker player, is that somethin general for ENFPs? I sometimes make sick calls that arent logical.

A trait I appreciate less now that im a bit older, is that I hate to loose. Im more competetive then I would prefer. In everything really. same for you?

One problem I havent managed to handle is my constant lateness. Been late all my life to school and work and would like to change this. any tips? Maybe I shouldnt ask fellow ENFPs that..hehe.

I also have issues with being perceived as a player when all I really want is to fall for someone. But I tend to end all my relationships within 6 months. Any comments or tips on this would be nice.

I also have trouble balancing my sleep properly. I have always wanted to be able to sleep at 11 and wake up at 8 but it wont work. I always return to the solitude of night after days filled with activities. same for you guys? how do you find the balance if thats the case?

It also frustrates me sometimes when I feel like I really understand someone and there situation but that they dont get me. Which personality types understands me/us the best?

Lastly, ill mention what I never talk about in real life. Ever since I was a kid I have wanted to "save the world". Not knowing how or from what. But really helping people on a large scale. Had a realitycheck after high school..haha. But those feelings have come back the last couple of years. (im 25) Is this something you guys have given any thought?

PS. any bookrecommendations? Not books on pshycology more fiction. Figure we should have a similar taste in literature. I like the alchemist by paul couelho and Until I find you by John Irving alot.

Btw, is it the same for you? That you dont plan what youre gonna write you just start typing and then see the result when its finished?

Alright, first post completed. Ill check back and hopefully someone has answered something atleast=)

Secretagentman,

Thanks for the fun intro. It's fun to see someone excited about discovering MBTI. It is amazing and seems to go so contrary to this idea that we're free creatures that decide everything we want for ourselves.

I'll add my replies to your questions:

But I also have issues with being typecast. Is it the same for you guys?

Being typecast didn't bother me, but I figured it out when I was 37-38; by then, I think I was just tired of banging my head into walls and was happy to have some insight into why.

For example, I have a very bad sense of direction. Not read anything about that here, is that just something I have?

I have a better-than-average sense of direction. But I do forget to pay attention to things, or just assume that I'll remember at the last minute, which I usually do.

I even remember in junior high all the girls wanted me to palmread them. All I did was see them interact and then made assumptions about them using my instincts. Has anything similar happend to you guys?

Personally, no. Sounds pretty cool.

Im also quite a good poker player, is that somethin general for ENFPs? I sometimes make sick calls that arent logical.

I can see how theoretically that could be true for ENFPs. I've never had the patience to learn all the different things that the cards can add up to. Too many rules.

A trait I appreciate less now that im a bit older, is that I hate to loose. Im more competetive then I would prefer. In everything really. same for you?

I was extremely competitive when young, and still am so in limited fields.

One problem I havent managed to handle is my constant lateness. Been late all my life to school and work and would like to change this. any tips? Maybe I shouldnt ask fellow ENFPs that..hehe.

Yes, in general I try to fit too much into a certain amount of time, plus I don't put that much importance on deadlines. However, I'm pretty good at planning, so I most of the time I am on time, because I plan out how long each step will take and work my way backward from when I have to be somewhere so I know accurately when I have to leave.

I also have issues with being perceived as a player when all I really want is to fall for someone. But I tend to end all my relationships within 6 months. Any comments or tips on this would be nice.

Yup, big time "player" here as well, albeit unintentionally. For me, the solution has been (and I should add this is a work in progress, so I could be completely wrong) to realize that my behavior is really just hurting my own feelings, to spend some time around couples and realize they have a really good thing, to realize that relationships aren't perfect out of the gate and are something that run into obstacles and those are opportunities to get closer by overcoming them, so the relationship is something that grows over time, and lastly, to force upon myself the discipline of talking and communicating honestly before getting physical, and realizing that sex is for me a way to avoid establishing that vocal intimacy.

I also have trouble balancing my sleep properly. I have always wanted to be able to sleep at 11 and wake up at 8 but it wont work. I always return to the solitude of night after days filled with activities. same for you guys? how do you find the balance if thats the case?

ha, ha, that is so true. No real solutions, except to say, turn off all electronic things maybe around 10, and realize it takes maybe 1 hour to 30 minutes to get ready for bed, so if I want to sleep at 11, I have to put down what I'm doing by 10:30 and get into bed. I promise myself I can read some in bed, that's a way to lure myself away from whatever interesting thing I'm doing.

It also frustrates me sometimes when I feel like I really understand someone and there situation but that they dont get me. Which personality types understands me/us the best?

Ooh, you'll hear a lot about that here. Most people seem to believe that INTJs are this perfect match for ENFPs, especially INTJs. I'm not convinced -- I think it's fun for the INTJ, but for me as an ENFP I can say their coolness and lack of emotion doesn't really fulfill me. If you look at research by Paul and Barbara Barron-Tieger in romantic relationships, types sharing 3 or 4 letters tend to have the most stable long-term romantic relationships. You can extrapolate that to friendships. I know (like most ENFPs) tons of people, and feel such value in having people in my life that I accept them all in with open arms, but the ones I enjoy the most are ENFPs. Interestingly, they are not at all easy to get close to, in spite of remarkable compatibility. We can be pretty stand-offish, I guess. I have a stepsister who is ENFJ and I always enjoy talking with her.

Lastly, ill mention what I never talk about in real life. Ever since I was a kid I have wanted to "save the world". Not knowing how or from what. But really helping people on a large scale. Had a realitycheck after high school..haha. But those feelings have come back the last couple of years. (im 25) Is this something you guys have given any thought?

Yup. Also want to make a big impact on something positive. Not really sure how, yet. But wanting to is a start, right?

PS. any bookrecommendations? Not books on pshycology more fiction. Figure we should have a similar taste in literature. I like the alchemist by paul couelho and Until I find you by John Irving alot.

"A Prayer for Owen Meany" by John Irving also rocks. You'd probably like Saul Bellow's "Humboldt's Gift". Haruki Murakami's "The Wind-Up Bird Chronicle" is pretty cool in a way that I suspect appeals particularly to ENFPs. I also really liked Somerset Maugham's "The Razor's Edge". "Notes from Underground" by Dostoevski is an oldie but goodie.

Btw, is it the same for you? That you dont plan what youre gonna write you just start typing and then see the result when its finished?

Yup.

Ooh, you'll hear a lot about that here. Most people seem to believe that INTJs are this perfect match for ENFPs, especially INTJs. I'm not convinced -- I think it's fun for the INTJ, but for me as an ENFP I can say their coolness and lack of emotion doesn't really fulfill me. If you look at research by Paul and Barbara Barron-Tieger in romantic relationships, types sharing 3 or 4 letters tend to have the most stable long-term romantic relationships. You can extrapolate that to friendships. I know (like most ENFPs) tons of people, and feel such value in having people in my life that I accept them all in with open arms, but the ones I enjoy the most are ENFPs. Interestingly, they are not at all easy to get close to, in spite of remarkable compatibility. We can be pretty stand-offish, I guess. I have a stepsister who is ENFJ and I always enjoy talking with her.

It depends on the person, damnit! Good lord, I am sick and tired of reading this crap as though every INTJ and every ENFP are identical! "Coolness and lack of emotion" are the top layer....and if that's all you allow yourself to see of a person, I feel sorry for you and the superficial relationships you must have had. As for the 3 letter compatability....I don't think I personally could stand to be in a long-term relationship with any of the ENTPs I've met...or the ESFPs... I don't know any ENFJs or ISFPs, so I can't really say, and I know an INFP would drive me insaaaaaaaaane, feeling like I'd have to walk on eggshells and worry about every word coming out of my mouth being taken the wrong way. Don't get me wrong, they're great friends....but there's a world of difference between friendship and romantic attachment. Friends can still keep parts of themselves hidden....but if you're constantly in someone's intimate business for years, there's not very much they can keep from you without the relationship failing for that very reason.

-waves hand dismissively, putting into text form so the gesture can be read- Blah. There are multiple archetypes of every personality type - we all develop differently based on our experiences and environment. An ENFP raised in a strict, overbearing household will be different than an ENFP raised by negligent parents who don't care one way or another what their child does, and both will be different from an ENFP raised by indulgent, smothering parents....whether there were siblings and the number will make a difference...as well as the personality types of the siblings. The same goes for INTJs. There are so many variations....and gender makes a difference. >.> I get the feeling you're thinking man when you think INTJ. INTJ males are more territorial...and it's harder to earn their respect and get them to open up as another male....they're going to be more inclined to question the ulterior motive for openness and geniuness of a male ENFP than they would of a female. I imagine the same is true of female INTJs meeting their first female ENFP... Then again, female ENFPs also have more social leeway to remain naive and over-the-top than males do. A male INTJ meeting a male ENFP is probably thinking in the back of his mind "Who the heck is this weirdo and why is he talking to me? Is this some kind of trick?" Eventually you can prove your integrity to them, but only if you give them a chance.

I'm sorry...I got a little bit testy there. >.> NFs are SENSITIVE with a capital S if they have heavy feeling. Sure, they 'get' you in the sense that they are empathic and understanding....but there's more to love than just being comfortable. I'm challenging you to find someone *not* based on type. Find someone who shares your interests. Find someone who you connect with on more than just an understanding of how they see the world. And just being NF doesn't automatically mean they'll "get" you. Take a look at the functions....only the INFP shares all the same functions as the ENFP. The INFJ and ENFJ have them flipped....so everything we extrovert is introverted and everything we introvert is extroverted for those 2 types. There are times where one of my INFJ friends really doesn't "get" me. She's a sweetheart and as accepting as they come, but several of our core beliefs clash because of Fi vs Fe....and where I love possibilities and new ways of doing things, she'd rather just nail down a plan and be done because of Ne vs Ni. We keep our debates light....but that's because we aren't part of a single unit the way a married couple is. If we had to make decisions together, we'd make each other miserable....NFs are INCREDIBLY STUBBORN about some things, especially when emotions are involved. >.> And with ENFPs.....excitement = volume....which means it could escalate very easily into a shouting match if it's an issue we feel strongly about.

ENFP: Ne Fi Te Si
INFP: Fi Ne Si Te
INFJ: Ni Fe Ti Se
ENFJ: Fe Ni Se Ti

>.> I'm not arguing that you should avoid any type....I'm actually arguing for you NOT to avoid any type just because of descriptions or a desire to be...antagonistic to an idea of compatability someone else came up with. I've figured out what I like and don't like from experience with various types. I feel uncomfortable with other extroverts most of the time....I value the quiet assurance of an IN**. That's me, not you.....but take it from me, you can miss out on the most awesome people in the world even just as friends if you dismiss them on outward appearance and demeanor.

-hug- Relax. If you're comfortable with yourself independently, that's attractive....and friendship is the first step to something better.

There, there lys.. JerseyCity is allowed to think that INTJs are not for him. As an INTJ I'm not offended at all. Of course bad experiences with one type will give you bias towards that type later. I'm not convinced JerseyCity has experienced many real INTJs, especially not women, but it doesn't matter. If he's decided that we're cold and void of emotion, he'll see us in that light and confirm that thinking, when he meets us.

I do not recognize myself in being cold or not have emotions. I think stereotyping is dangerous as you'll only want to confirm what you think instead of being open to seeing a person as a whole, starting from scratch. I know I'm not being perceived as cold or void of emotion by others. Maybe in my teen years or in my twenties, but not now. People tell me all the time that they love my warmth and my enthusiasm and that I'm different from others since I have new takes on things. At work, I get results that my coworkers aren't able to match. It's a misconception that NTs don't feel. We have as many feelings as you guys and we're also driven by our intuition and gut feeling, just like you. But when it comes to decisions, we may override emotion by making a logical/rational choice, which makes us different from you. We won't always use logic in decisions, especially when love is involved. We are not machines... When I'm interacting with others, I can keep my emotions in check, that doesn't mean that I'm not experiencing them on the inside. We appear tougher than we are, as I've said earlier we are extremely afraid of rejection and hypersensitive to anything resembling being rejected.

Being with someone your own type, can be more frustrating than good I think. And make no mistake, no one will ever 'get' you 100%, it's all about having a partner who is willing to listen and try to understand you and please you, regardless of their preferences and type. My ENFP sis was just with an ENTP, they shared 3 letters. She got nervous about his extrovertness, perceived him as flirty, and he was more P than her, making her take a lot of responsibility for planning and following through. She hated it. She didn't think of him as dependable.

Barron-Tieger & Keirsey say that the N vs. S preference is the most important to have in common. It's how you communicate and take in the world, so it's kind of crucial to be on the same wave length there I think. As I've said before, an extreme at either end of the scale won't work, it'll create a lot of friction and trouble. I am an I, but not an extreme I, I know I'd work very well with an E. My two I exes have annoyed me since they were too I for my taste, nothing new happened and they didn't have a network with a lot of friends which made me think less of them.

To Secretagentman (OP): Ns tend to get easily lost since we're not very good at observing details and are so caught up in our own heads, we don't pay attention as much to the outside world. I get lost too, (even if I have a sense of direction.) I'll have to concentrate when I travel so I won't get lost, but I often do anyways.
John Irving is one of my favourite authors. You should read his earlier novels like: 'The world according to Garp' and 'The Cider house rules', they're all good. Murakami as JerseyCity mentioned is also interesting, he's a productive writer, so there's a lot of titles to choose from. When I travel I actually like Dan Brown, it's an easy read and he always makes his novels into thrilling page turners. (I sometimes get annoyed by him, so one book pr. travel suffices.. He,he) If you make sick calls during poker playing, my guess is that you are extremely intuitive and that you use your gut a lot and that you are good at reading people, which is a great skill when it comes to playing poker. Sometimes it pays off, other times it doesn't. Are you as good when it comes to playing poker online, or do you need to be in the room as the other players? (If you have any online poker playing experience.)

Lol, Lys, it seems like we've had many of the same thoughts at the same time.

But I also have issues with being typecast

It made me mad at first. I felt like I was not in control. In reality control is an illusion. I've come to accept it. I am proud of how i've handled the cards I have been dealt.

One problem I havent managed to handle is my constant lateness. Been late all my life to school and work and would like to change this. any tips?

I have a cell phone with internet on it. This way I can be early and read. Always try to get somewhere 15 minutes early. If your early, you get to read wiki on your phone. If not, you'll be on time.

A trait I appreciate less now that im a bit older, is that I hate to loose

I hate losing at chess. I take it personal.

I also have issues with being perceived as a player when all I really want is to fall for someone.

Good looking ENFPs... I've littertary been told before "I don't date players" what is funny is that I am SO NOT a player. Ya know Keep doing what you are doing. Its better to be labeled a player then have no girls!

Im also quite a good poker player, is that somethin general for ENFP

Yes, read people and good at theory. If you can control emotions

Hi everybody.

Finally found a free minute and have time for this part of my sick variety of interests right now. Im literally reading and gathering information about so much. Physics, economy and politics being the main interests at the moment. Psychology still has my attention and ive read every reply in this thread and I really appreciate all your comments.

I feel however that the best thing to do is use this as a tool to get to know yourself and be aware of your weaknesses, and thereby minimizing their effects. I also feel knowing your strenghts will build confidence in being able to achieve great things.

Another thing thats kind of funny that ive managed to do is to send this test to more then 20 friends. Every single person has felt a lot of the information is very accurate. Two of my best friends are ENTJ's, the Executive. I really get a long with them and have a lot of discussions that are very educating in a sense. Its amusing though that 3 ppl that ive given the test to has become ENTJ's. These 3 guys were the only ones that claimed that it is not that accurate. I pointed this out to them and advised them that there could be more then coincidence and that they should try to know themselves more. If you know ENTJ's you know this would not be the best thing to say. They tend to feel their way is the best way. But me being there close friend they are open to my ideas more so then the average joe.

If you have any questions just line em up and ill try to answer=) At the moment I don't have any. It might take a week or two but late or not...I will always answer.

Funny that noone that ive given the test to has tested as an ENFP. I was looking for an INFJ or INTJ as I read this was the most compatible with me => http://www.personalitypage.com/ENFP_rel.html

I finally found a girl that I had deep talks with and who trusted me a lot without really knowing me, she said she normally didnt open up. If you are like me I assume you are familiar with a situation like that. Anyway, she is hot to and lives in Paris...I was kind of hot for her but she had a man. Now she is single and invited me over to Paris for a few days in spring...as friends supposedly. But if I decide I wanna go for it. Just to test the compatability part in the real world, do you have any advise here? She is my age but feels she should be with someone older.

She is not in my life so i dont really think of her much, but a try would not be the worse thing in the world? helpful tips here accepted=)

Alright, have a nice week all!!

Cheers

I finally found a girl that I had deep talks with and who trusted me a lot without really knowing me, she said she normally didnt open up. If you are like me I assume you are familiar with a situation like that. Anyway, she is hot to and lives in Paris...I was kind of hot for her but she had a man. Now she is single and invited me over to Paris for a few days in spring...as friends supposedly. But if I decide I wanna go for it. Just to test the compatability part in the real world, do you have any advise here? She is my age but feels she should be with someone older.

She is not in my life so i dont really think of her much, but a try would not be the worse thing in the world? helpful tips here accepted=)

Alright, have a nice week all!!

Cheers

I would like to point out that this is a real girl and not someone that ive only seen pictures of. I think I was clear but then again some ppl misunderstand stuff in the weirdest ways=)

I would tell you to go for it. Even if it's just as friends, there's nothing wrong with that - and it sounds like it would be a fun experience anyway. She obviously likes you enough to invite you in the first place....and she admitted she doesn't open up to people very often, so I'd say you have a good chance. Anyway, have fun, be yourself, and don't freak out.